COLLECTED funny looks and startled glances, and checking in a fisheye comfort mirror covering an underground corner, see convexly that I sport a very large nose, domed forehead, tiny receding ears and in the bendy perspectives, a blinking black eye and I've no idea how I got it.
I'd had no collisions and I can't remember jamming shades, finger or paintbrush into my face. Not thumped yesterday. Could it be abuse or self-abuse whilst sleeping? No. No sleeping since shaving and no black eye then.
Tough, gym-toned, fit looking dudes look edgy, check around the talent for harder and looked away.
I'm not going to pick a fight with them but they aren't so sure. Women look concerned. Perhaps one of their gender did it and I might turn nasty. Perhaps they want to mother me, perhaps not.
Where do you look when you've got a black eye? How do you look out of one? Brazen is hostile. Humble I don't do. Sorted you aren't. Cool is impossible. Victim? Sporty ... buggerit, chip out the frozen peas - got any concealer?